Every morning I call my mom for an update on how things are going on the home front. I just got off the phone with her.
Me: Hey, mom. How's it going?
Mom: Hey. Tabitha is over playing with Gabi and we just took a green worm from the back patio and set it free on the front lawn.
Me: A green worm? Did it crawl through the paint?
Mom: Paint? Oh. No, it was actually green. I'm in the kitchen and I'm going to make...
Mom, to Gabi: Gabi! No! I don't know how much is in there!
Mom, back to me: I wanted it to be sugar free, but I don't have enough Splenda, so I'll have to half and half it with sugar.
Mom, to Gabi: Gabi, NO!! Get out of here right now.
Mom, back to me: She gets so willful when friends are over! When I tell her to do something, she does the opposite!
This is when I hear some massive bickering between two three year olds in the background.
Mom, back to me: I have to go! I have some refereeing to do. Bye.
Me: Okay, bye!
I'm pretty sure I heard the line go dead before I got my goodbye completely out.
I turn back to my computer, imaging the chaos occurring at my house while enjoying the peace and quiet of the office.