How About I Just Go To The Wedding Naked?

You know that high you feel after a successful day of shopping? I totally had that on Tuesday night! My mom and I were giggling like school girls as we headed home, totally excited about all the clothes I had found.

I had scored big time at Macy's. I had no idea they had such a large, hip selection of clothes for the generously endowed. And to top it off, I've gone down two sizes! I think I might have even done a little techno right there at the three-way mirror, but that's between me and the security camera.

But the best part? And I can't believe I'm excited about this. I found a dress! That's right, a real, 100% genuine dress. Not a faux dress, where the top and skirt are made out of the same material to give the illusion of a dress, which is what I'd been looking for. And not a dress that is more like a sack. I'm almost afraid to post the picture, in case anyone thinks it's ugly, but here you go:
















That model must be super tall, because the dress is much longer on me. But it still looks good. And it'll look even better after I get some Spanx.

As soon as I got home, I emptied bag after bag to show my loot off to Gilberto, saving the dress for last. And when I said TA DA! Well, his reaction wasn't exactly enthusiastic. I though it might be because he's a guy, and I'd just spent a bunch of money, but something about his response nagged at me.

Last night as we were getting ready for bed, I decided to pull the dress out and try it on, thinking he might like it better once it was on me and not the hanger.

Me: You don't seem very excited! Do you not like it?

Gilberto: No, I like it. But I thought you were going to get a black dress. Like the one you wore for New Year's Eve that one year.

Me:Um, that was 4 years and 60 pounds ago! I would look horrible in a strappy number like that now. And black? Do women really wear black to weddings in Brazil?

Gilberto: Yes! Why wouldn't they?

Me: Well, here black is for funerals! I mean, I guess you could wear black to a super fancy formal wedding, but most people don't. And that dress I wore was really fancy, for a black tie party. Do the women wear such fancy dresses just to regular weddings?

Gilberto:Yeah! They do! I mean, I think they do. Just go ahead and wear the one you bought. You look nice in it.

First, I don't know what woman has ever settled for nice. That shopping high I had? Totally deflated.

Second, now I'm freaking out that I need to buy a super formal black dress! I wouldn't have minded being the only woman there in pants, but I don't want to be the only woman there in color! Gilberto is going to call his mom today, but sometimes a lot of important details get lost in the translation.

I would look better in black, but I don't want to have to go back out into the shopping world again. I got a ton of great things and thought I was done. I was stress free! Now I'm more stressed than ever.

And what if I get a black dress, and then end up looking out of place because I'm the only one dressed for cocktail hour?

Looking on the bright side, at least my hair and nails will look great.

One thing that's making me feel a tiny bit better? Check out the purse I bought!
















Isn't it beautiful? It's really big, and I think I'm going to use it as my carry-all in Brazil. It'll hold clothes, shoes, a water bottle, sun block, a camera, pretty much EVERYTHING! The picture really doesn't do it proper justice.

A fabulous purse is almost enough to make me forget about the dress, but not quite. See what happens when you give an inch? I should've just demanded some pant respect.