Peep Show

It was bound to happen. When someone commented on a previous post that they were looking forward to reading about whatever bra incident would happen next, since I seem to be prone to them, I knew it would happen. My luck is like that.

What´s funny about it is that it happened here in Brasil. And while it all seems a bit risque to me, it certainly didn´t seem to shock anyone else. Even when my shirt was hanging open down to my belly button.

So for Absolutely Bananas´ Make Me Laugh Monday, here is the next installment of the great bra scandals that seem to plague me.



I´ve lost a bit more weight since I bought all of my vacation clothes. They are hanging off me. Which is a good thing, in the overweight world. Clothes that are too big make you feel, well, smaller!

But it´s not such a good thing when the clothes are so big they reveal parts of you that are illegal to show in public.

In my wish to fit in a little bit better, I had bought a bunch of fancy shirts with very low cut necklines, most with sleeves that start on the very edge of my shoulder. It felt so daring to show so much skin! But as I twirled in front of the dressing room mirror feeling all glamorous, I didn´t consider the mishaps that could occur if they didn´t fit just right. So much for foresight.

So now I´m here on vacation trying to look my best with shirts that are way too big. When I´m standing up, they look fine, albeit a little baggy. But when I sit down, the necks gape and hang down well below the proper area. And I´ve been totally oblivious until we are already out and about and I look down to find that I´ve been flashing my bra for all of Santos to see.

It´s especially bad when we´re in the car and Gabi is climbing all over me. I might as well not even be wearing a shirt at all, with all the tugging and rearranging it gets. I´m pretty sure the guard on the ferry we took the other day stood by our car because of the show going on inside.

And while no one says a darn thing, which I´m not sure if it´s because they didn´t want to embarrass me, or thought it was perfectly normal, it is NOT the look I was going for.

Yesterday was the final straw. At lunch, I looked down to see that my whole bra was on public display, my neckline practically hanging UNDERNEATH my boobs. Again, no one said a word to me. No funny looks from the waitress or from the table next to us with a small child. Gilberto didn´t seem to be phased one little bit, and my in-laws, sitting across from me with a perfect view, didn´t seem to notice anything amiss at all, either.

Despite the seeming acceptance, as soon as we got home all of the pretty shirts I brought were banished back to the suitcase. No more gaping necklines for me. I have enough to worry about with my pants falling down.

Sorry, Santos, no more booby shows from me.