Something miraculous has happened.
Gilberto has agreed to get a Wii! WOOHOO!
There was quite a bit of jumping up and down in excitement. And some clapping. And I do believe some jazz hands flared up a few times, too. All this just to tell him about the wonders of the Wii.
And then after he agreed, I threw in a few Whoops and a twirl or two. Which was a bit too much for my aging body to handle, and it all ended with me choking for my life on the living room floor after I inhaled some spit down the wrong pipe.
After recovering, he told me that there was just one condition. If my dreams of getting Wii Fit were to come true, he absolutely needed Guitar Hero.
When I told my neighbor, she said she'd price them the next time she was on base. She called me Sunday morning to tell me she was heading over, and would I like to go with her? Um, YES!!
We took separate cars, and I knew I’d need to pull over for a day pass once we got to the gate. But when they told me to bring in my registration, proof of insurance and driver’s license, my heart skipped a beat. Because just then I remembered that my driver’s license had expired.
I decided to get everything together, give it to the guy with a big smile, and pretend that all was hunky dory. Maybe they’d accidentally overlook the expiration date.
That’s when I discovered that I also didn’t have my most current car registration (the last two years don’t really help much) OR current proof of insurance coverage.
Zero out of three probably wasn’t going to get me on the base. But knowing that my Wii was at stake, I had to at least try. I gathered up my outdated documents and stepped out to greet the Marine who came out to help me (and HELLO there, you handsome young man).
Me: Welllll, it seems that I don’t have anything current with me. I mean, everything is current, I’m definitely not illegal, ha ha ha, but I don’t have the current documents on hand!
Marine: I see, ma’am.
Me: Here’s all the old information. But you can see by my tags that my registration is current. They’re not stolen, ha ha ha. Um, yeah, so not sure if that will work for you?
Marine: That should be fine, ma’am. But you said you also didn’t have your insurance card?
Me: No, I do everything online, and forgot to print out the latest update. Because they don’t prompt you to print, and you know, with my mommy brain the way it is. I’ll have to remember to do that from now on! Going forward, I'll be sure to be up to date. Yes, so, um…
Marine: Do you have a number you can call to verify?
Me: Oh! Yes! Let me do that! Hello, Geico? I’m here on base trying to get a day pass, and don’t have a current insurance card. Can you speak to them?
Marine, taking my phone: Hello, ma’am. This is Lance Corporal so and so with the United States Marine Corps at Camp Pendleton, and I just need to verify the proof of coverage. That will do. Thank you, ma’am.
Marine: Ma’am, here’s your pass. You are good to go.
Me: Thank you! Phew, I was a little worried, ha ha ha. This kind of thing always happens to me, ha ha ha. I just have that kind of luck.
Marine: Yes, ma’am. Have a good day, ma'am.
What I HAVE is a knack to turn a normal conversation into a blundering disaster. I would have died from embarrassment, but I had a Wii to go get. And I needed to get out of there before he realized he’d forgotten to ask to see my driver’s license.
I think I confused him. Or made him nervous, with my highly unintelligent blabbering. Because he also put my husband's first last name (in Brasil you have two) as my first name.
So here's the plan, for any of you who find yourselves in the same predicament. Use your child being in a car seat to lure the MP outside into the hot sun. Then make confusing conversation until he doesn't know which way is up. You might need to use your friend's high ranking husband to seal the deal (which he'll see when filling out the sponsor info). Then hightail it out of there before he heads into the air conditioning and realizes what he's done.
It turned out that the electronic store on base was out of Wiis, but I was able to get Gilberto’s coveted Guitar Hero. I don’t think my neighbor will be going back for a while, so I’ll just get the Wii at a normal store. Which will be Wednesday, because that’s when Wii Fit comes out, and I must have it THAT VERY DAY!
I’m especially eager to find out if my core balance if off kilter. Don’t ask me why. It just seems like something that every person should know. And all of my data will be locked up as tight as my knitting stitches.