Sunday, August 10, 2008

Her Timing Is Impeccable

I was holding Gabi during worship service this morning. We were swaying to the music and having a very nice mommy daughter moment.

She sweetly cupped my face in her hands and leaned in to ask me a question.

Gabi: Mommy? Do all boys have peanuts?

Me: What? Oh. Um, yes, all boys have penises.

Gabi: Even little boys have peanuts?

Well, what an interesting conversation to get into during worship!

Me: Yes, even little boys. ALL boys have penises.

Gabi: Mommy? Do all girls have beeginas? Even the little girls?

Might as well keep going at this point.

Me: Yes, sweetie, all girls have vaginas.

Gabi, getting louder: But older women have hair on their beeginas. Mommy, does all that hair make you itch?

Oh my!

Me, trying not to die with laughter: No, it's not itchy. Now, let's not talk anymore. It's rude to talk during worship.

The best part about the whole thing? There is now a whole row of people at church that know I have a hairy vagina. I'd much rather have kept them guessing.


  1. I was there! My kids are a bit older, but I remember those moments.

  2. I am cracking up! Timing really is everything. hahaha :)

  3. That is so hillarious!
    You are a much better mommy than I am. I would have just said "Shhh, no talking right now" to avoid talking about the subject in public.
    You are too funny!

  4. Love it, love it, love it! Ciara has started asking questions like that as well...though none so aptly timed as that.

  5. Thank you for a great laugh! I needed it today. Love the peanuts and cute!

  6. What is it about church?!?! It brings out some of the most hilarious conversation. I love that you wrote it! We have all had so many similar conversations!

  7. When my youngest was 2 and we were sharing a restroom stall at church, she frowned at me and loudly announced: "Ew! You need a new 'gina cos yours has FUR all over it!" I ended up shaving and still do to this day.

    *** I'm still laughing! ***

  9. omg - my cheeks hurt honey!!

    had to read it out loud to the hubby - we are cracking up!!

    sooo funny :)

  10. I just can't believe! hahaha! I do believe she picks the worse times to ask you those questions!!!!

  11. Great. ;)

    Been there- there are people who have shared the sdame public bathroom as me when from my shared stall you have heard, mommy why are you bleeding? are you ok?

    not at the moment, no.

  12. Hahaha! Kids are so uninhibited (is that a word? I like to think so.). Anyway, that is too funny :) Just keep reminding yourself, everybody has one. Though it's probably not something you go around sharing, it's not like they didn't know (that came out wrong, but I think you know what I'm trying to say.) Moving on...
    Too funny ;)

  13. That was so funny. They sure come up with some funny the funniest places.

  14. Out of the mouths of our babies, keeps you grounded!! HA HA HA!
    Too cute! My 3 year old just gave me the big sex ed talk from his view as well! LOL

  15. Beeginas and Peanuts! I wish I would have thought of those names when my kids were a little smaller!

    Too cute!

  16. bahahaha! Too too cute! :)

  17. Good stuff! Along the same lines as when Natalie was little and she yelled "Boys have penis and girls have vagina!" VERY loudly in the church parking lot...reminded me of that movie Kindergarten Cop. Don't you just love it?

  18. Well I for one am so glad to know about your hairy vagina... :) Kids are way too curious - and honest at the most inappropriate times!

  19. So incredibly funny. Great place to have that particular conversation.

    Poor you!

  20. I bet the people of your church are happier to know that your have a 'hairy vagina' versus a 'slick track', I just guessing :)

  21. Well I guess you'll know who's happiest to know, by who sit next to you next Sunday. HAHAHA.

  22. He can! hehehe!! Everybody is always amazed by this! When I met him, I knew he could speak spanish fleuntly, but I had no idea how much he could understand portuguese and that he could talk like he can! I felt so proud when he came to Brazil and all my friends couldn't believe how well he can speak!


  23. Oh my gosh!!! This is sooo funny! I love it! Wish I had been a fly on the wall. thanks for sharing:)

  24. In Sunday School they should be covering Paul's Letter to the Obstetrician. That would answer Gabi's questions in a Vatican approved way.

    Read my kids' debate "Vagenis or Mangina" to see how complicated parenting will get.

  25. Oh you brave girl.
    Imagine the google searches that will find you.
    I. can. not. imagine.

    Hilarious story!!!

  26. Your going to be the Queen of Google Analytics for a while after this one!

    Too funny.


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