As I was passing a really hoity toity maternity store on my lunch break today, I remembered that I needed to get a gift for a friend, and it was now or never if I was going to get it to her on time. So I popped in.
I'm always a bit apprehensive about going into stores like this. I'm not made of money, and they kind of expect you to be if you step over their threshold.
The salespeople always pounce on me as soon as I walk in the door with a million questions about what I'm looking for, and then direct me to super expensive stuff (a $130 blanket? for a baby? to puke on?). Then when they ask with a great big smile if they can wrap it up for me, I have to be all, "Oh, this is lovely. Yes, it sure is. But, um, I'm looking for something more in the $25 range?"
Why oh why can't I just peruse on my own? Without all the interaction? It totally blows my cover and reveals me to be a person of modest means. One who has no business being in a super expensive hoity toity store. I always end up feeling so out of place.
But for the first time in my life I wasn't the most out of place person in a hoity toity store.
It was the grandma trying on maternity pants.
I kid you not!
As I made my way towards the back of the store, where most places tend to hide the cheapo shelf, a woman came out of one of the dressing rooms. I was surprised to see how old she was, but even more surprised when I realized she was there trying on maternity pants.
She stood in front of the mirror, a very tall, thin and elegant woman, adjusting the fit by running her thumbs under the wide band of stretchy fabric that lay across her flat belly. And then she turned to me and asked me if they looked okay!
They actually did, so I told her yes. But I think she could tell I was a bit taken aback because she went on a little spiel about how comfortable the pants were. The fit so well, in fact, she wouldn't even need a tailor!
The two saleswomen who were standing nearby to help didn't bat an eyelash. So it's either the hottest new trend in elderly fashion to shop at maternity stores, or those saleswomen were some of the best actresses I've ever seen.
I purchased my gift and left while the older woman who was not pregnant but trying on maternity pants was still twirling in front of the three way mirror.
Such an odd thing to see! But I'm not complaining- she took all the attention off of ME! I was able to shop in peace for once.